29,068 notes
30 / 5 / 2013 @ 00:06
(source: canadianslut)

canadianslut:

angry and quite offended that you don’t have a crush on me

153,715 notes
27 / 5 / 2013 @ 22:34
(source: cosmic-nine-year-old)

cosmic-nine-year-old:

once i was at a party and they asked me what my dad did for a living and said that he died when i was 12 and of course i hear the collective “aaawww im so sorry”

and then i hear some girl whisper from the back “you’re halfway to becoming batman”

AND THAT IS HOW I MET ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS MORAL OF THE STORY IS IF YOU USE BLACK HUMOUR I WILL LOVE YOU

9,402 notes
27 / 5 / 2013 @ 22:33
(source: trapghoul)

thepanduchessofshade:

barbiewitch:

when people say they don’t date black girls what i hear is “i’m not interested in the baddest bitches on the planet i enjoy mediocrity and green bean casserole during the holidays and milk with my pasta and keds”

(Source: trapghoul)

98,096 notes
27 / 5 / 2013 @ 22:33
(source: arkhams)

arkhams:

hey … so,.. uhh… (looks at notecards) did you uh did …you fall out of heaven because um (drops cards) shit fuck oh god fuck im so sorry  youre-youre just s o.pretty i m soryr

17,342 notes
27 / 5 / 2013 @ 22:32
(source: vanillish)

sincopation:

bigtimerussian:

i want to sue my parents for making me take out the dog when it’s cold i need a lawyer

claire sawyer future lawyer

(Source: vanillish)

2,087 notes
27 / 5 / 2013 @ 22:32
(source: rabioheab)

rabioheab:

ladies call me ed sheeran because i look like i smell like cat food